So...
I work in But is it Art? (As featured in The Guardian independent shopping guide 2007)
The shop has been in Reading for over 30 years and sells all manner of weird and wonderful cards, gifts, t-shirts and pictures.
Enough of the shameless plugging.
After being inspired by a French checkout girl (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/europe/france/4029292/French-check-out-girl-becomes-best-selling-author.html) i decided to document the goings on of my day to day encounters with the shoppers of my precious town.
Something i have noticed when it comes to retail is that the words used to describe the place you work often has a direct correlation with the personality of its customers. I often hear the adjectives 'funky', 'different' and 'cool' bounce off the shop walls and these words exemplify the kind of buffoons who set foot into the beloved place i call work. Throw in the odd Daily Mail reader, packs of ironically cheery emo kids and a man who thinks i'm called Charlie and we're just touching the surface of something quite magical. Nothing would give me more pleasure than seeing 'But is it Art?' the sitcom air on BBC3 at 1.30 in the morning sometime in the future. Anyway, enough rambling of dempgraphics and television aspirations...
In my opinion, there is no doubt that the customer is the most intriguing aspect of any retail environment. The individuals i encounter on a daily basis are all beautifully unique yet contradict themselves with an aura of overwhelming stupidity. Like a plague of paradoxical zombies they meander around the shop, confused looks on their faces, relying on you to save them from any problem they may encounter because, as i have learned, a customer not only expects you to know everything about the place in which you work, they expect you to know everything about EVERYTHING.
Today, a man brought up a fire bucket ashtray (£7.50, an excellent gift for any smoker) to the counter and enquired how much it would cost to send said item by post to Japan. How the fuck should i know!?
What a preposterous question, maybe i had the look of a Japanese postman?
I explained politely i had no idea how much it would cost to send and he trotted off to return it from whence it came. This got me thinking, If i had instantly given him an approximate figure would he have followed through with the purchase or was this whole interaction destined to be a waste of his and my time?
I'm fairly confident it's the latter, which again got me thinking...
Why did he even bother in the first place?
To be honest, i don't think he knew. I do have sympathy for these people, put me in an office anywhere and i become a giant baby, incapable of completing the most basic of tasks. Certain habitats just don't suit certain people and this inevitably leads to foolish behaviour.
Despite my mild annoyance at this micro experience i am still absolutely fascinated by what the clientele of tomorrow will bring to the table. These little nuggets of patron idiocy are so essential to my daily grind that i should probably welcome them rather than rant about them. Ranting is a lot of fun though. I would like to point out that i had nothing against the customer who annoyed me today, he's probably a jolly nice chap when he's not buying ashtrays. And this was the most interesting transaction i had, twas a boring monday. I couldn't have written nearly as much about the lady who dropped her change on the floor.
Stereotype of the day
Australian man buys lighter wearing a straw hat with Fosters logo emblazoned around the edge.
Retail Lesson #1
The customer expects you to know everything about EVERYTHING.
Homework
Brush up on Royal Mail international parcel prices
Nico
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